Coloring inside the lines

 We have recently discovered that Evie likes rules. Or maybe not discovered this, as much as we've been told this by Evie's teacher.  On our end, the lovely big sister is still finding ways to illustrate her disapproval of the new arrival.  But, fortunately she continues to take it out mostly on us and remains sweet to Cora. 

I've been in regular contact with Evie's teacher for tips on how to handle some of her behaviors, and also to ensure she's not acting out at school.  According to her teacher, Candace, Evie is a doll at school. And a major rule follower.  She apparently keeps an eye on the whole classroom and is certain to tell people if they're out of line.  Oops. We may have a tattle tale on our hands!  Candace insists this is a good thing, and that we can build on it.  That Evie's appreciation of rules will be helpful around the house. The negative side of tattling can be addressed, although she's probably too young to understand that concept yet. 

I've seen some of this come to light with her actions around the house.  For example, Evie has been given quite a few coloring books since Cora's arrival. Sweet neighbors and family know that a big sister needs something to keep her occupied while little sister is being tended to.  Evie has been loving the books, and I was watching her the other day and realized she was coloring inside the lines.  At 2.5.  With a magic marker that only shows color on special paper, and the color takes a second to appear.  I'm not even sure I can stay inside the lines with such a marker!  But, she loves it.  She also is enjoying being a helper - raking, changing Cora's diaper, and even starting to get herself dressed.  If she knows that the only thing standing in the way of going someplace she wants to go, or eating a snack she's interested in, is not being dressed then she picks out her clothes and successfully puts most of them on. What's more is she gets excited for the clean laundry to be brought upstairs.  She likes hanging up her dresses and putting her clothes away in the appropriate places.  I don't hold out hope that this behavior is permanent, but it's fun to watch for now. 

 Evie has also started to show preference for playing with her friends rather than constantly meeting new kids.  She asks for Sloan and Izzy regularly, and also asks for Nina as well as all four Inzitari (neighbor) kids.  She isn't thrilled when I bring her to a new playdate, but get's excited when I tell her we're meeting up with any of those people.  Let's hope that transfers soon for a desire to spend some fun time with Cora...

Here I am mid-post, and I need to apologize for the stream of consciousness style writing.  It's wonderful having Cora here, but sleep deprivation is certainly taking it's toll this time around.  I now look back at how hard I thought it was when Evie was an infant and laugh at myself.  I had no idea what people with two or more kids had survived.  Don't get me wrong, we're doing fairly well considering, but the constant demand for my time is draining.  I love both girls so much, but would love a minute to do anything that wasn't related to one of them.  Other than clean the house or make dinner, that is.  I know it'll come eventually.  But it's going to take some doing on my part.  I need to set Cora on a schedule, and that's not easy to accomplish with all of Evie's activities.  I also find myself getting a bit nostalgic about how much attention I was able to give Evie as an infant and feel guilty about how little Cora gets.  I had the realization of how much birth order matters.  Evie is of course a rule follower.  She really doesn't have a choice.  We've given her our undivided attention for 2.5 years and we've been pretty consistent with enforcing the rules.  She gets it.  I know that won't be the case with Cora.  I can already tell Cora will be louder than Evie, out of necessity if nothing else.  Evie is able to command my attention almost completely, so unless I'm nursing Cora she is mostly ignored.  I feel guilty putting that down.  But it's true.  When Evie was an infant I held her constantly and nursed her whenever she wanted, and picked her up immediately when she woke up.  She also slept in our room until she was 6 months old.  We moved Cora to her crib at 3 weeks. I don't rush in when she wakes up.  I wait to see if she'll put herself back to sleep and go in once she's made it clear (via screaming) that she has no intention of doing so.  I try my best to hold her regularly, but outside of nursing, it's much easier to set her down so I can focus on Evie.  Or showering.  Eventually cooking once the neighborhood meal train comes to an end.  And, well, cleaning will take a back seat.  We decided that for the winter we'll have a cleaning lady come 2x a month to help out.  Since we'll be inside all the time, I know I'll need the help while Cora is still so young.  I hate to spend money on something that seems superfluous.  But, I look around the house and want to cry at its condition (and that's just the piles of laundry, dirty floors, dishes in the sink, and unmade beds.  I can't even look at the half-painted hallway, dining room, and bedrooms.  I dim the lights and try to ignore those for now...).  I suppose sanity and a feeling a sense of peace where we spend all our time is well worth the small expense. Perhaps I should feel embarrassed to write any of this down.  But, I want Cora and Evie to know the reality of it all.  I could ignore them both and tend to the house, but it goes against every grain in my body to do that.  My intention behind this blog is to eventually print out these ramblings and give it in a book to the girls when they're older.  I don't keep a baby book.  This is my way of preserving some of the memories for myself and them.  

The appearance of the sun is an optical illusion

And, I digress.  I am clearly not coloring inside the lines of this post's theme.  With that said, two days ago it was Halloween.  We were excited for Evie's first opportunity to trick or treat.  Last year, living in the city, we decided not to
participate.  Plus Evie was only 1.5.  This year, we decorated the house, invited over friends, and planned to make a big deal out of the holiday.  We took Evie to the Halloween store and let her pick out (within reason) whatever costume she wanted to be.  She chose a bee.  How cute!  Will and I got on board and I dressed myself and Cora as bees too, and got Will a beekeeper costume.  We couldn't wait to make an appearance at our neighbors houses.  Then Chicago's weather got involved.  It snowed in the morning, hailed in the afternoon, and then was sleeting by evening.  There were 70-80 mph winds.  It was freezing cold.  Perhaps the worst possible weather you could draw up for a holiday involving running around outside in outfits that don't involve a jacket.  So, the dads went out with the kiddos and braved the weather for a select few houses.  They armed themselves with spiked cider.  And the neighbors passed out more booze to the poor parents who were carting their kiddos around in the weather.  I stayed at home with Cora and the other moms we invited and passed out candy to perhaps 30 trick or treaters.  We saw some families driving alongside their kids as they went from house to house.  But most people just decided not to go out.  Thankfully I kept my receipt for the candy... Evie didn't seem to be too upset by the weather though, and according to Will absolutely loved seeing our neighbors and getting candy.  What kid wouldn't, I suppose.  She has already told us she'd like to be a ladybug next year.  If only she knew how long a year takes in kid days.